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Flame Mistress
05-08-2011, 07:00 PM
Now, this is my first ever chaptered fic. A long one at that too. It's (hopefully) gonna consist of five books, seven including the prologue and the epilogue, which are one-shots. The stories are based on PMD, and are all linked together. Wish me luck that I actually get to finish book one... Anyway, the prologue is up right now! Enjoy!

(Thunder is a Jolteon, and Ocean is a Vaporeon.)

Thunder's Story (PG)

I was walking with Ocean when it all happened. It was the usual kind of day for us; sunny without a cloud in the sky, the typical weather for the spring and summer of Oakwood Town. It was a quite boring place to live actually - a shop, a school, a church, a library, and houses made up the whole town really. I wouldn't have been able to survive childhood without my best friend Ocean. She was the omw who made my life worth it.*
So we were walking along as I said, talking about general things, like our recent typical days. If we had been allowed to go to the Pokemon Academy Guild, our lives would have been a lot more lively; however, our parents thought going on an adventure would be too 'dangerous', and forbid us from leaving the town. Ocean and I turned right towards the alleyway - we weren't looking where we were going - when we found the most peculiar thing I had ever seen in an alleyway.*

There, in a cardboard box, was a baby Eevee, cowering in fear and worry. It looked like it was only a few days old, as it still wore the tufty baby fur Eevees had when they were born. The poor creature had obviously not eaten food for a while, as although it still had the baby fur, its skin stuck to its skeleton, making it look horrifyingly skinny. Upon closer examination, I could see there was a tear-stained note tied to the Eevee's neck, reading; "Please take good care of my poor baby".
Ocean nudged me, and I when I looked at her, she was pointing at something, her eyes filed with fear. When I looked at the 'thing', I saw something disgusting; a dead corpse of a Flareon. It looked as if she had only been dead for a week or so, and it was clear that the Flareon was the Eevee's mother.*
We carried the Eevee to the hospital quickly, but thankfully it had no serious medical conditions. Then we both agreed that we should take care of the young Eevee.*

So Flame - as we called him - started his new life with us. An exciting one at that.*

We didn't have enough experience, and soon we learnt that looking after a baby wasn't the same as looking after a doll. We often had to let our parents do the gross stuff, and feeding him was difficult as he tried to wriggle away all the time. Once he became six months old, things became a bit easier, as Flame was now a toddler in Pokemon age, and began to walk, talk, eat and discrete by himself. He was an early learner, having already learnt Tackle and Tail Whip at the age of nine months, unlike the average Eevees who learnt both at an year old.*

On his first birthday, Ocean and I gave him a Fire Stone as a present for him. He evolved into a Flareon, to suit his name. He already knew three moves at the time of his evolution; Tackle, Tail Whip and Ember. He was practically worshipped by the other young Pokemon.*
Of course, however strong he was, he couldn't attend the Pokemon Guild Academy in Treasure Town, which was the place every budding adventurer went to, until he was eighteen months old. By that time, he already knew Tackle, Tail Whip, Ember, Quick Attack and Bite. We all knew he was ready. We couldn't help feeling proud of Flame, the very Eevee, now a Flareon, who we had raised up with extreme care - well, Ocean had taken real care of him, while I taught him to use all the moves (he didn't self-tutor himself) - but nevertheless, we were still extremely proud of him. Ocean and I both knew he was going to be a great success.*

And boy, we were right.*

CloudNine
05-09-2011, 01:52 AM
Wow. Nice. Just a small error. Word in bold.


She was the omw

Sin
05-09-2011, 07:02 PM
nice story flame seems like u got a knack for making stories like this

100shayne
05-10-2011, 01:56 AM
nice..................

Flame Mistress
05-10-2011, 03:04 PM
I just realised... It's so short! D:

I'm editing my first chapter of the next character's story to make it a bit longer, then I'll post it here. Probably sometime today or tomorrow.

Leobreacker
05-10-2011, 06:40 PM
If I was a good manga artist, I sweaaa I would make your fics into manga! good job!! --- AGAIN!!!!

Flame Mistress
05-10-2011, 06:56 PM
Thanks, and after a bit of editing here and there, here is the real start of the Eeveelution Chronicles - Flame's Story! Flame is a Flareon - as explained - and, well, you'll find out more later!

Flame's Story Chapter One

I felt my legs trembling as I stood on the foot scan panel. What if they thought I was an intruder? What if they didn't let me in? My brain was filled with countless worries, ignoring my thoughts of telling myself to calm down.*
Thankfully, I heard the guard Diglett tell me to proceed, and I made my way in to the Guild, sighing relief. However, I soon realised that the security check wasn't over. This time a Bibarel blocked the way, a table with forms on top beside him.*
"You must be a newcomer, right?" he asked in an overly cheerful way. I nodded nervously. "Well welcome to the Treasure Town Pokemon Academy Guild, or for short, the Treasure Guild! I am Larry the Bibarel, and I am in charge of all newcomers. Please sign this form, and make sure to read the rules!" he said brightly, my anxiety still persisting. He was way to happy for my liking, and was a bit suspicious. I quickly completed the form - Flame, Flareon, Male, eighteen months old - and handed it over to Larry, who briefly looked at it before tossing it into a box. Next I read the rules, my favourite being 'Smiles go for miles', then I went downstairs to the great hall, where all the other newcomers were as well.*

Once downstairs, I was immediately greeted by an overly cheerful and squawky Chatot. "Hello there! I'm Feathers. And you are...?" she asked. I managed to squeak out 'Flame', dazed by her sudden loud voice. "Good! I believe you are the last one here. Come, follow me!" Feathers replied, practically dragging me by my collar to a group of other sweat-dropping Pokemon. "We're ready now, children, and now I will pair you up!" she announced. "Lila the Minccino, pair up with Terra the Turtwig please. Zorro the Zorua, please go with Isabel the Misdreavus. Spark the Raichu, please pair up with Aqua the Piplup. And Flame the Flareon, please pair up with Dawn the Espeon."
I shuffled over to the Espeon standing in the corner. She seemed rather sad, it was a mystery how she evolved into one.*
"Um... Hi," I said, looking at her sorrowful face. Eh, she didn't look so bad.*
I was wrong.*
She said nothing in return. Now I was feeling rather uneasy next to this silent Espeon. I had been eager to make some new friends; oh well. I'll just hang around with others then. But for some reason, the devil seemed to take over me as I had the sudden urge to make fun of this... weird Espeon. *
"So, if you're so sad, how did you evolve?" I sneered jokingly, unfortunately creating the wrong expression to... what was it again? Ah yes, Dawn.*
"Not funny, Flareon," she replied icily. I was unfazed, having experienced this many times.*
"Oh, so you evolved by mistake and don't want to admit it? Aw. You're such a wimp, not to tell me that... it's a miracle that you actually EVOLVED, you know, being such a saddo..." I said, smirking, trying to make a fun argument to cheer things up at least a little bit more.*
It didn't work.*
"I'm not a saddo! I did everything I could!" she shouted, while I cowered in fear. Woah there missy, no need to do that, I thought.*
"If you knew what happened during my way here, you'd see what's wrong!" she yelled at me, making me regret my decision of arguing with the psycho Espeon - Dawn, that's her name, now I remember - and stomped away to our cabin, catching the attention of all the others. Some shook their head, some stared in confusion, and one even muttered 'crazy psychic' under his breath.*

Feathers walked over to me and patted my back with her soft, colourful wings. "There, there, She just had a rough time getting here, that's all, can't blame her. She'll get over it soon," she told me. So, had something gone wrong on her way here? Maybe an accident? Had someone died? I just had go find out what. *

Sin
05-10-2011, 10:53 PM
these stories are like soap operas cant wait till the next part

Ante
05-12-2011, 04:48 AM
wow... These stories are pretty good dude... don't stop

CloudNine
05-12-2011, 04:57 AM
She's a girl.

Leobreacker
05-12-2011, 08:43 PM
She's a girl.
No shes not, she is a Legendary Mistress XD

Flame Mistress
05-12-2011, 09:03 PM
Thanks for telling them I'm a legendary mistress XD Anyway, next chapter is up, and this time, I want reviews please!

Flame's Story Chapter Two

The rest of the others didn't seem so bad at all. Actually, I made good friends with Spark and Aqua, Spark who was a happy-go-lucky Raichu who evolved on his birthday like me, and Aqua who was a wannabe Prinplup, and was quite bossy, but nevertheless she was a great friend. Too bad I wasn't in a team with them.*

Dinner was scrumptious here as well. Who wouldn't resist a delicious Pecha berry pie? It was the best meal I had ever eaten. Along with the sweetest Cheri juice... it was heavenly. Yes, heavenly.*
After dinner though, I had no choice but to return to our cabin. Curfew here was ten o'clock in the night, so it wasn't too bad, but I shuddered at the thought of being stuck with that creepy Espeon again.*
When I entered the room at ten o'clock precisely, I found Dawn crying into her bed. What was wrong with her? I plucked up the courage to ask her and approached the sobbing Espeon.*
"What's wrong?" I asked softly. She either ignored me, or didn't hear me. I asked again, this time louder. "What's wrong?"
"My friend," she replied finally, between sniffs. "Leafie."
"So, what happened to this Leafie?" I asked, curiosity sprouting in my mind.*
"She died," Dawn sobbed.*
I was shocked at those words. "What?" I exclaimed. "But how?"
"On our way here," Dawn explained, tears still streaming down her face, "we got attacked by some criminals. We tried to fight them off, but..." Dawn broke into a flood of tears. "She sacrificed herself to protect me from a Dark Pulse, because she knew it would be super effective on me. She died herself... she did it for me... I was so sad, I could've devolved then. Feathers found us, and we tried everything to save her, but it was all in vain."
I couldn't help feeling sorry for her. I wouldn't be able to bear it if Thunder or Ocean died, either. "Well, it will be alright soon, why don't you make some new friends? That'll help fore sure," I advised Dawn, trying to comfort her. It seemed to work a bit.*
"Thanks," Dawn answered, smiling, though her eyes were still filled with tears. "I'll make some new friends... starting with you." she chuckled, then proceeded to bombard me with endless questions. "Where did you come from? Are you excited? Were you popular back at home? How strong are you? Who's your family?"
The last question struck me. Who was my real family? I had Thunder and Ocean, but I knew they were just like carers. "I don't know," I replied at last.*
"What do you mean, you don't know? You've got to have at least some kind of family!" she exclaimed.*
"I was abandoned when I was a baby, you see, and Thunder and Ocean - they're a Jolteon and a Vaporeon - took care of me until I left. Basically, I have no real family," I answered. Yeah, that was true in some ways.
"Well," Dawn said, " I have a mum, a dad, two grandmas, a grandpa, two brothers, two sisters, seven cousins, two aunts and three uncles, and-" Dawn noticed my shocked face. "What's wrong?" she asked, concern clearly evident in her voice.*
"You have such a big family," I replied truthfully. "And I don't even have proper parents, let alone a proper family." Wait, what had I just said? Thunder and Ocean were my family! They were the only ones I had!
Dawn looked as if she was really sorry for me. "And I thought losing my best friend was bad... Don't worry, you'll make loads of friends here to make up for not having a proper family," she assured me, patting me on the back. She was right. I'd make lots of friends here.*

theBlob
05-14-2011, 08:57 PM
I like this even if flame was mean in 2 and knew 5 moves in 1 lol.
Can't wait for the next one

Flame Mistress
05-15-2011, 06:33 AM
Chapter Three is up! Thanks for the reviews guys!

Flame's Story Chapter Three

The next few weeks at the Guild were mainly composed of training sessions. In that time I learnt two new moves - *Fire Spin and Fire Fang - and I felt stronger than ever. However, soon enough I realised I still had a long way to go, watching Dawn execute a perfect combination of Swift and Psychic, all well coordinated. Battling wasn't just any old thing when you threw in random attacks, you had to plan out your strategies *carefully and correctly with skills as well. That was what made it even more fascinating.*
I battled Dawn a few times, and nearly all of them Dawn won, despite having a smaller movepool than me. Her speed was just outstanding. Combine that with her Sand Attack and Swift, she made sure that j couldn't damage her while she managed to attack me every time.*
But nobody could outspeed Spark, not even the seniors with the most experience. He truly ran like lightning. Only the best psychics could keep track of him when he was running at full speed. Only a golden blur appeared in front of our eyes. No wonder his Thundershock always hit. Of course, he naturally learnt Double Team thanks to his illusional speed.*
After about six weeks of hardcore training, we were finally ready for our first mission. Our team, Me and Dawn, and Spark and Aqua's team, joined up together for the first real adventure of our lives.*
"Hey, have you got a team name yet? We're Team Sparkle," Aqua proudly announced. "It wasn't my idea," Spark mouthed over her shoulder. Dawn and I both sweatdropped.*
Suddenly Dawn cried out. "Flame, we don't have a team name yet!" Dawn shouted in alarm.*
"Uh... Team Rainbow?" I muttered, not really thinking. Unfortunately Dawn and Aqua heard.*
"That's a great name! Team Rainbow! Whatcha think of it, Aqua?" Dawn boasted.*
"So cool! I wish I'd thought of that before!" Aqua squealed. "Team Rainbow, at your service!" she saluted, and both females doubled up with laughter. Spark raised an eyebrow at me. I shook my head in disbelief.*

Our mission was to retrieve a stolen TM91 Flash Cannon. The suspect was a Sableye, spotted near the woods. This was gonna be fun!
The trek through the woods wasn't so pleasant, however. The thick bushes and undergrowth blocked out sight more than once, and we arrived at our destination two days later than we had supposed to.*
Once we arrived, we began the search for the Sableye. Hours later, we found nothing. Just as we were about to give up, a purple figure with hexagonal eyes appeared, clutching a sack.*
"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" the Sableye sneered menacingly. "Young adventurers aren't so easy to find these days! Anyway, have you come for 'the TM then?" We nodded anxiously. "Well then," the Sableye growled with an ominous grin, "Bring it on."
I made the first move. I spat an Ember at the Sableye, which he quickly dodged. Dawn then attempted to use Confusion on him, but he seemed to be unaffected by it. She fired a Psybeam next, which also did nothing at all.*
Aqua used *Bubblebeam to drench the Sableye, and Spark followed with a Thundershock to not only shock him completely, but also to paralyse him. We sighed with relief; however, that moment did not last long, as the Sableye still managed to fire an ultra-powerful Shadow Ball at us, along with a Shock Wave to damage us further. Dawn already knew there was nothing that she could do, and Aqua attempted a Water Pulse, but she realised that her beaks couldn't move to create the swirling ball of water, as she was paralysed.*
That only left me and Spark.*
I attempted a Fire Fang, digging my teeth into the Sableye's skin, but this only made my own fangs hurt more. "Don't you know that my skin is as hard as iron?" the Sableye cackled.*
Spark then threw in a Discharge, which, despite being paralysed, he managed to dodge. I tried a , but the Sableye countered with Payback, which damaged me with double the power. I screamed with agony.*
Spark was then caught unawares by a Shadow Claw from the Sableye, when we realised that he was no longer paralysed. Spark used Quick Attack, which was a quite stupid thing to do as the Sableye was part ghost-type and the move hardly did much damage, nevertheless the Sableye countered with Payback again, as Spark yelled in pain as well. Suddenly, I used a move that I had never used before; Last Resort. The area was flooded with light, which focused on the Sableye, and hit him square in the face. After the light had disappeared, the Sableye had fainted.*

Please point out any mistakes to me.

BlackSteel
05-15-2011, 07:12 AM
wow amazing *round of applause*

theBlob
05-15-2011, 12:43 PM
I tried a , but the Sableye countered with Payback
Only mistake I could find :D

PokemonHunter
05-15-2011, 01:08 PM
U spelled realized wrong. Nothing else much

Flame Mistress
05-15-2011, 02:38 PM
^ Nope, it's realised in the UK. :)

Just let me edit chapter four, then it will be posted soon.

PokemonHunter
05-15-2011, 02:44 PM
oh...k. srry. im from US, so yeah

Flame Mistress
05-17-2011, 05:18 PM
Chapter Four is up guys! Enjoy, and keep those reviews coming!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Flame's Story Chapter Four

"Well done!" Feathers congratulated us with a pat on the back. The Sableye was arrested, and the TM was ours. Unfortunately nobody in the gang could learn it, unless you counted Aqua when she evolved into an Empoleon, so we decided we donate it to Feathers, in case someone wanted to use it.*

"I never knew battling against real outlaws was so hard," I sighed, collapsing onto my bed.*
"Me neither," Dawn replied. She was already lying on the bed, obviously exhausted. "But we did it anyway, and that's what really matters," she added, beaming brightly.*
"I guess so," I said, smiling back, and I fell into a lumbering sleep.*

That night I had a dream. A strange dream at that. I dreamt that Spark, Aqua, Dawn and I were battling fiercely against many outlaws, some whom I recognised. Zorro, now a Zoroark, and Isabel, now a Mismagius, were battling against us. Aqua, now an Empoleon, struggled to fight against Zorro, while I was duelling Isabel. "Team Valley will never lose!" she cried out after a dug a Fire Fang into her.*
Then I woke up, panting breathlessly.*

I decided not to tell anyone about the dream. Thankfully no one noticed my worried face, not even Dawn, as they were all concentrating on improving their battling skills.*
Aqua was battling Dawn today. Both executed powerful moves every time, trying their best not to lose. Aqua fired an extra strong Water Pulse at Dawn, which made her confused. Immediately, seeing her chance, Aqua attacked again with Brine, knocking Dawn out.
"You go girl!" someone shouted.*
"Yeah, you're so strong!" someone else yelled.*
"Burt the Espeon did great as well," another Pokemon commented, starting a great argument about who was better, Aqua or Dawn, making me and my friends all sweat-drop.*
All of a sudden, Aqua's body began to glow, which forced us to cover our eyes. The light exploded, and when we peeked through our hands/paws/wings/fins, we saw that Aqua had evolved into a strong and sturdy-looking Prinplup.*
"Oh my god! I'm a Prinplup now!" Aqua exclaimed, jumping in joy. She then tried out a powerful, new move, Whirlpool, by accident, which swept us all and sucked us into the vortex. "Aaaah!" we all screamed, and by the time Aqua cancelled her attack, we were all drenched to the skin, moaning, screaming and exhausted.*
"I think you need to learn how to control your moves first," Feathers groaned weakly. Others nodded their head, making Aqua blush in embarrassment. "You'll get hang of it soon," Spark assured her.*

Not for a looooong while, though.*

Flame Mistress
05-22-2011, 08:24 AM
Ok... So no reviews this time? Oh well. Fifth chapter is officially up next!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Flame's Story Chapter Five

The next few weeks went by quite uneventfully. If we had a mission, they were all stupid, like retrieving a Spoink's pearl and rescuing a Pokemon from the depths of the dungeons. Boring.*
However, on my twelfth week of attending the Guild, there was a big commotion at the Academy. "Isabel and Zorro have escaped!" Feathers squawked frantically. "We need to find them!"
Two weeks later, we discovered that they had joined a notorious team of outlaws, who called themselves 'Team Valley'. They were a terrorising group who swept through towns and villages. Many adventurers had attempted to disband the group, but to no avail. They were almost invincible. They were the most feared gang in this part of the world.*
The adventurers' faces were etched with fear. They knew that sooner or later Team Valley would attack their hometowns. Someone needed to stop all this. It was the biggest crisis ever.

According to the others.*

So no wonder were we surprised when we were chosen for that job of defeating Team Valley. *

Now why was the name Team Valley so familiar?

"However, you will have to go through some intense training in order to defeat Team Valley," Feathers told us, instructing Spark, Aqua, Dawn and I what we were to do to defeat the evil team. "We chose you four because we knew you had potential. So you will have to train day and night in order to become strong enough to unleash your full potential."
So that's exactly what we did. Spark made sure that his electric attacks never missed, Aqua concentrated on putting full power into her moves, Dawn cleaned her psychic skills so that she could predict the actions of her foes and control them, and I trained in hopes of becoming as fast as I could. If i had everything, the one thing I lacked was speed. Feathers told me my power, my defence and my accuracy was perfect, I just had to grind up that speed. Sure enough, there were hardly times that I could dodge a special attack, which made me vulnerable.*
I learnt many things since that fateful day. New moves (my strongest being Iron Tail), new strategies, and *new skills. Obviously my friends and I hardly had any time for a break, but it was worth it. All that training would prove to be vital in our battle with Team Valley. Occasionally we - especially Aqua - would complain about the hardships, but Feathers kept reminding us how important this training was for us, and that it would benefit us greatly. We all believed her, and kept working harder and harder until we were finally ready.*

Six moths after my entry to the Guild Academy, we were ready.*
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Rubbish build-up, I know, but please R&R anyway!

Sin
05-22-2011, 08:32 AM
Good good cant wait till next chapter comes out i just love this story :D

Flame Mistress
05-26-2011, 06:32 PM
Next chapter up! Enjoy!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Flame's Story Chapter Six

"Good luck!"
"Take care!"
"Beat them up!"*
"You'll do great!"
Cheers rang into our ears, wishing us all the best of luck. We said our final farewells, and left the Guild Academy. Team Rainbow and Team Sparkle were now on their journey to save the world... or so it seemed.*
"Have we got enough Oran Berries? We'll need them a lot on the journey," Spark asked. I nodded my head, revealing our plentiful supply of berries, including Orans. "We've got more than enough."
"Gummies? Bands? Scarves? Apples?" Spark questioned anxiously. "Stop worrying Spark, we've got plenty already, enough to last us up to two weeks," Aqua assured, giving him a pretend smack.*
However Aqua's words soon turned out to be false, as only after a week, we ran out of apples, and were nearly out on Oran berries as well. "We'll just have to find some more," Dawn shrugged.*
The problem was, the trees around here weren't the ones that produced fruit. We searched for hours, and still we found no berries or apples. Eventually we split up, Team Rainbow and Team Sparkle, hoping that one team would at least find some more food.*
"What time is it?" I asked Dawn, slightly worried.*
Dawn looked up at the setting sun. "6 o'clock in the evening," she answered. I panicked. It had already been six hours since the beginning of our search!
"Maybe we should turn back now..." I suggested anxiously. "It's late now."
"Maybe you shouldn't," an unfamiliar voice said chillingly behind us. We turned around in fear, to come face to face with a tough-looking Tyranitar.
"You," Dawn snarled, tensing up. "You were the one who killed Leafie!"
"So I did, I remember you," the Tyranitar replied, smiling menacingly. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Draco, of Team Valley. I have-"
"RUN!" I screamed, and dragged Dawn away from the terrible creature. "You're not going anywhere!" he yelled, cruelty in his voice. He fired a Dragon Pulse at us, which we both managed to dodge. However, Draco managed to catch up with me, and dug in a Thunder Fang into my body, making me cry out in pain. "NO!" Dawn screamed. She then shot a Psybeam at Draco, followed by a Signal Beam. He cringed in pain a little, but quickly recovered and spat a Focus Blast at Dawn, who used Protect to negate the attack. I then proceeded to hit him with a Fire Spin and Last Resort, when Draco used Roar to reflect the attacks and distract us, buying enough time to escape.*
"Ow... My ears hurt," Dawn groaned, her face full of anger and annoyance. Her expression suddenly changed to one of horror and worry as soon as she spotted how many injuries I had received. "Flame! Are you alright?" she yelped.*
"Coward Tyranitar," I growled, not concentrating to what Dawn was saying, vowing to get revenge on the evil Tyranitar, before collapsing from exhaustion. The last thing I heard before blacking out was Dawn calling out my name, kneeling over me, pleading me to get up.*

I found myself in another dream, similar to the one i had before. Draco, Isabel and Zorro were terrorising... Oakwood Town. "Surrender to Team Valley!" Isabel screeched as Pokemon fell one by one. I now remembered that the villains Aqua and I were battling was Team Valley. We were the chosen ones for the final showdown.*
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Please point out any mistakes this time!

Sin
05-26-2011, 07:43 PM
Didnt see any mistakes but i this chapter was awesome dawn running into her old enemy draco the suspense is killing me cuz i wanna know what happens next

Flame Mistress
05-26-2011, 08:47 PM
Thank you Sin! You really are a fan of this, aren't you? XD Next chapter up! Again!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Flame's Story Chapter Seven

"Flame, are you okay?"
"What happened?"*
"Flame! You're alive!"
My head felt dizzy as I struggled to get up. *Where was I? What had happened?
My memory slowly returned to me. We ran out of apples, I got into in a fierce battle with Draco, he escaped, and I collapsed. That was about it.*
"Are you okay, Flame?" Dawn asked gingerly. "We managed to bring you here, it's a place called Oakwood Town..."
Oakwood Town? Home? No wonder the place looked so familiar! However, my excitement did not last for long as the dream I had came into mind. "I've got to tell the others," I said, sprinting off, leaving a very confused Dawn and Spark, and a rather annoyed Aqua.*
I ran and ran until I reached the house where I had been raised up; my formal home. I knocked on the wooden door, hoping to get a reply.*
The door creaked open, and a very familiar blue snout appeared. "Flame?" Ocean exclaimed, opening the door fully. "You're back!" she then embraced me tightly, and called for Thunder. "Thunder, Flame's back!"
"Really?" Thunder shouted, and came scampering down the stairs. "Flame, you really ate back!" he exclaimed, and hugged me enough to squeeze the living life out of me.*
"Ocean, Thunder, I've got to tell you something," I said after the warm welcomes, and I continued to tell them about my dream, and how Team Valley would destroy the town. "It's true, believe me," I told them desperately.*
"We've gotta tell the others," Thunder said. "This is an emergency."
We ran outside, calling all the residents, and telling all of them what was going to happen. Murmurs rose in the crowd, until an elderly Absol stepped out. "It's true," he announced, "I had the very same dream yesterday night."
Now sure that this 'disaster' would happen, the villagers all fed to their homes, barricading themselves and preparing for the battles, being instructed my me, Thunder and Ocean what to do. Sure enough, Team Valley came charging into the town after only a few minutes. Panicking, we started to sprint towards home, when I suddenly remembered Dawn, Aqua and Spark, whom I had left behind. "My friends!" I shouted, and ran towards the opposite direction, where they were probably very worried about me.*
However, on my way, I came face to face with a colleague of mine; Zorro, now a Zoroark. "Hello, old friend," he snarled evilly. "I was waiting for that day when I could battle you - no, I mean kill you." I prepared to launch an attack when Zorro suddenly dug in a Crunch into me, leaving me to yelp in pain. I then blasted a Flamethrower which landed square on his face, burning it. "Gyahhh!" he screamed, and scampered away looking for a stream.*
"Flame!" Ocean screamed, kneeling over me. "Are you alright?"
"Yeah," I groaned, trying to stand up. "This is nothing compared to others."
"Oh, I'm going to kill that Zoroark when I see him again!" Thunder shouted. "If I was in the Guild, I would-"
"If you are so concerned, why don't you join the guild?" a familiar voice said behind us. We turned around to see the Absol we met before.*
"You see, I joined the guild when I was three and a half. That's where I learnt to predict the future. I did a lot in my days, defeated some organisations. It's never too late to join."
Thunder hesitated before answering. "Well, you see, we'd have loved to if we were younger, but... not now. I'm sorry, but I'd rather stay behind, thank you very much." The Absol looked disappointed, but kept smiling nevertheless. "It's alright, but never forget that you can still help us." Thunder and Ocean nodded. "We'll be obliged to help some day," they replied with a determined look.*
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
The truth is, I've got up to chapter eleven written already!

PokemonHunter
05-26-2011, 08:53 PM
Love it!! This is really awesome! Love everything about this!! Not that i saw, but no mistakes. As i said, its awesome!! XD! :)

Flame Mistress
05-26-2011, 09:18 PM
Just saying, I won't be on for a while. Personal issues with other members.

PokemonHunter
05-26-2011, 09:24 PM
post another episode! the suspense is killing me wats gonna happen next!!

Sin
05-26-2011, 09:34 PM
dont leave D:

Flame Mistress
05-30-2011, 08:18 PM
Back I am, along with a new chapter. Enjoy.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Flame's Story Chapter Eight*

We continued our journey, and thankfully stocked up on some more apples and berries. The next few days, we had to climb mountains, cross rivers, and even trek through caverns. That was where we faced the worst obstacle of all.*
Lost in a cave, exhausted and feeling hopeless, the six of us were on the verge of collapsing when we felt an ominous wind.*
"This doesn't feel well," Spark said, shaking violently along with Aqua and me. Only Dawn seemed to be unfazed. "Look out!" Aqua suddenly yelled, and behind us swooped a Haunter with a malicious grin on his smooth face that spent shivers down our spines.*
"Hello, hello, hello," he growled. "What do we have here? A beautiful lady, two sturdy looking men, and one... tomboy... girl." Aqua immediately fired a Bubblebeam at that comment, but the Haunter just teleported away. "Young lady, do you dare to harm the great Leonardo of Team Valley?" he snarled, and teleported nearer to Aqua, close enough to grab the frightened Prinplup and launch a Hypnosis in her face. He then used Dream Eater, which caused Aqua to scream in agony. Dream Eater was known as the most dangerous psychic-type move, and it was having its full effect on her. "Let her go!" Spark shouted, sparks flying out of his cheeks, ready to attack.
"Oh, this is nothing," Leonardo said, proceeding to fire a Dark Pulse at the screaming Aqua. "THIS is my real power."
He didn't stop, despite our protests. "NO!" Spark cried at last, and threw himself in between the attack and Aqua, taking the attack instead. "Aaaahhh!" he screamed in pain as I quickly leapt forward to catch Aqua.*
"Quick, find the Oran Berries and a Chesto Berry!" I ordered Dawn quickly. She pulled out two Oran Berries and a Chesto Berry using telekinesis. I threw the Chesto Berry and an Oran Berry at the injured Aqua, while I threw the other Oran Berry at Spark, who managed to catch it in his mouth and regain his health a little.*
"Take this!" Spark yelled furiously, and proceeded to launch an attack we had never seen before. "That's Electro Ball!" Dawn exclaimed.**
The Electro Ball hit Leonardo in the face, paralysing him. "How dare you! Hmph, I've had enough of you. Let's get that elegant lady over there," Leonardo said, pointing at Dawn. I knew that this would be bad. She backed down in fear, but his disembodied hands grabbed her body. "Brace yourself, miss, it's not going to be the most pleasant experience," he said, chuckling.*
What I saw next was too horrible to describe exactly. Leonardo held Dawn in a protective shield, so that Dawn couldn't escape, and launched a Dark Pulse at it. Miraculously, the attack was absorbed in by the shield and filled it. We could hear Dawn's muffled scream in the distance. "What's he doing to her?" Aqua asked worriedly.*
I was too shocked to speak properly. "He's... he's c-cursing her, t-turning her e-evil," I stammered.*
I was paralysed in fear as the attack continued to turn the innocent Dawn into a devil. At last I could take no more.*
"Stop that torturing!" I yelled, charging forward to take the Dark Pulse instead of Dawn. "NO! Come back!" Spark and Aqua both yelled from what seemed to be miles away as I took the attack, gritting my teeth, trying to endure it. "Flame!" the now safe Dawn screamed in worry. I could only hope that my body would obey my mind and endure the Dark Pulse, and prevent myself from being controlled by Team Valley...
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
You like it? Or not?

PokemonHunter
05-30-2011, 10:16 PM
3 words: That was awesome! Can't wait for the next chapter! XD

Sin
05-31-2011, 01:01 PM
^Same
10char.

Flame Mistress
06-02-2011, 09:32 AM
Thanks! You guys really motivate me to continue this story :D You all get a cookie. :)
------------------------------
Flame's Story Chapter Nine

The Dark Pulse was stronger than I thought it would be. The move was beginning to take over my mind with many evil thoughts, and I used up most of my remaking strength to try to fight them off.*
Gathering up the last of my power, I launched a Flamethrower, trying to negate the Dark Pulse and damage Leonardo. It was a battle between sheer strength, and Leonardo was astonished at the force of my attack, and panicked a little.*
After what seemed like hours of standstill, my Flamethrower finally triumphed over Leonardo's Dark Pulse with a blast of energy that was unfamiliar to me. It looked way too strong to be a regular Flamethrower.*
"That's Fire Blast!" Spark exclaimed. No wonder it looked so powerful!
Leonardo grunted in pain as he fell to the ground, in front of Aqua, who immediately attacked him with Metal Claw. "That's what you get for messing around with my friend!" she yelled, her voice filled with annoyance.*
"I'll be reporting you to the boss," Leonardo moaned, and teleported away, out of the cave.*
"Let's get out of here now," I offered. My friends followed me as I walked through the maze of stalactites and stalagmites, eventually finding our way out of the cave.

We continued our journey towards where the Team Valley Headquarters was. The next part of the journey consisted of a trip down a river. Not just any river, though; a raging river with a current you could easily become stuck in, unable to escape, doomed to drown. *The worst part was, there was a waterfall at the end of the current.*
"Are you sure this is the right way?" Dawn asked nervously, her forked tail twitching anxiously, not trusting the map. *
"Of course it is! I know this place too well. It's where I come from!" Spark exclaimed, his ears standing proud and tall. "Besides, I never get our directions wrong, right Dawn, Flame, Aqua?"
"Oh yeah? And wasn't it you who led us to the Primeape territory and got us beaten up by those wild Mankey?" Aqua retorted.*
"Well, that was-" Spark began. * **
"And once you got us lost on a mountain, a freaking MOUNTAIN, where you can see everything," Dawn added, rolling her eyes.*
"I can explain-"
"Buddy, I have to agree with the girls, you're pretty bad," I told Spark truthfully, making him hang his head, a depressed expression on his face.*
"Alright then, YOU guys take care of the map and do the hard work. I'll set up the boat," Spark said, taking out a map and throwing it for Aqua to catch. "Fine then," she answered angrily.*
I watched wide-eyed as Spark miraculously took out from the bag three Pecha berries, five Reviver Seeds, ten Oran berries, six Sitrus berries, a Chesto berry, two Cheri berries, fifteen apples, nine Red Gummies, seven Blue Gummies, and four scarves before finally pulling out an inflatable rubber boat, neatly folded, and blew into the rather unstable looking it until it was solid enough, while Aqua and Dawn carefully planned out our route.*
"Everyone ready?" I asked. "Aye aye captain!" Dawn answered jokingly.*
"Good. All aboard!" I shouted playfully, pretending to be a pirate, while Dawn and Aqua followed suit, giggling at my attitude and pretending to be pirates as well, while Spark still kept his sad, disappointed face as he walked onto the inflatable pirate boat.*
As soon as we rowed the boat into the river, we soon found that there was no need to row; the current was carrying us faster than we needed to. We no longer felt like pirates anymore, but more like shivering pilgrims. Dawn covered her face, Aqua froze, Spark squeaked with fear and I shuddered as the river took us on a very, very fast ride along the very, very strong current. The trip down the river looked like it would be a very bumpy one.*

And I was right.*
------------------------------

Sin
06-02-2011, 04:12 PM
Awesome just Awesome loving this story so much

CloudNine
06-07-2011, 04:48 AM
I have been reading this for a while and I have to say, your use of English is good. But I have to point out, the battle scenes seemed rushed a little, not much description and suspence there. Otherwise, great storyline.

theBlob
06-07-2011, 06:14 AM
These are really good! I agree with Cloud, but the only errors I can see are mild typos. I can't wait for the next ones!

Flame Mistress
06-10-2011, 10:29 PM
Thanks Cloud, hearing that my use of English is good makes me feel really happy, since I'm not even English! The battle scenes make me a bit stuck sometimes, yes, but Ik working on that unit right now. TheBlob, as for the typos I can't really help it since this is touch screen :P

Sin
06-12-2011, 07:19 PM
where are my stories -rage-

PokemonHunter
06-12-2011, 07:46 PM
Ditto^

10char

CloudNine
06-19-2011, 10:24 AM
What? Typing a chapter on an iPhone? You must be one hell of a patient person.

Flame Mistress
06-19-2011, 07:25 PM
^ I'm not as a matter of fact XD

Anyways, your new chapter is all ready! Sorry for the long wait guys!
~~~~~~~~~~
Flame's Story Chapter Ten

The trip down the river was a rough one. No, it was absolutely violent. And even that was only an understatement. We were always jerked to the side when the boat took a sharp turn. It was a wonder that we actually survived the trip, with all that rocking and speeding.*
"Look! Flame! Over there!" Dawn suddenly yelled, frantically waving her paw at the space in front of us. I soon found out why she was so desperate like that. Right where we were heading towards was a giant waterfall!
"Do something!" I yelled to my friends. Dawn immediately used Confusion on the boat, trying to levitate it. "Not like that!" I shouted.*
"Get the spare row, quickly!" Spark commanded, and Aqua scrimmaged in the bag for the row. "It's not there, stupid, it's on the side of the boat!" Spark yell exasperatedly, sighing at his friend's hopelessness. "Dawn, will you get it for me please?"
"Sure," she answered, getting the row with her telekinesis and throwing it to Spark.*
The sound of the waterfall crashing into the pool below was coming nearer, and everyone was anxious about Spark managing to save them all. He quickly put the row behind two boulders just before the boat met its doom, holding it back for a while. However, as Spark had to hold on to both the tow and the boat, he found his body stretching and stretching until hec looked like a yellow Dratini.*
"You can do it Spark! Hang in there!" Dawn yelled, more out of fear than in encouragement. "Remember, we're all relying on you!"
"Come on Spark! Come on Spark!" I cheered him on. It was a wonder how his body hadn't already snapped in half, since he could've been twice his normal size.*
"Spark! Spark! Spark! Spark! Spark! Spark!" Aqua shouted. "If you let go, then you're dead!"*"More like all of us," Dawn mumbled.*
"G-guys, I-I'm trying, but t-this is harder t-than y-you think it i-is..." Spark stammered, struggling to keep a good grasp of the row. "S-sorry guys..." Spark said tiredly, and the world seemed to be in slow motion as we watched in horror as Spark let go of the row, our only hope, and was dragged back to the boat.*

Dammit.*

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!" we all screamed as the boat plumaged down the waterfall. Aqua braced herself, Dawn yelled out unrecognisable words, Spark kept cursing loudly, and I shrieked in pure terror. Being a fire-type, I was afraid of water, especially waterfalls and great tidal waves, which could both crush your bones.*
To be honest, our landing wasn't as frightening as I thought it would be. Despite my typing, I was still able to swim pretty well, and I paddled over to shore, tired, exhausted and out of strength. Aqua was already at the shore waiting for me, ready to help me up. Spark was the next to emerge from the pool, coughing and spluttering. He shook his head, still dazed from the impact. We all took a moment to rest on the warm, dry grass, taking the time to rest for a few minutes and restore our energy.*
"Where's Dawn?" Aqua asked finally, curious. Dawn! How could I forget her?*

Then a terrible realisation struck my head.*

Dawn couldn't swim.*
~~~~~~~~~~
Oooh! What will happen to poor little Dawn? Find out in the next chapter!
I think the main characters resemble the anime characters a bit: Flame is Ash, the main hero, Spark is Brock, the poor guy lugged with all the hard work, Aqua is Misty, being a fiery water type, and Dawn is, of course, Dawn.

Sin
06-20-2011, 04:41 AM
A-m-a-z-i-n-g.

theBlob
06-22-2011, 02:14 PM
O.o

Jolteon used Grow! Jolteon grew to level 4!
What? Jolteon is evolving!
Congratulations! Jolteon evolved into a ......................

Sin
06-22-2011, 03:42 PM
O.o

Jolteon used Grow! Jolteon grew to level 4!
What? Jolteon is evolving!
Congratulations! Jolteon evolved into a ......................

what was the whole point of this comment?

theBlob
06-24-2011, 05:23 PM
what was the whole point of this comment?

Trying to work out how Jolteon turned into a "yellow dratini" seeing as he is spiky.

Flame Mistress
06-28-2011, 11:20 PM
The last scene was very humorous in my opinion, I hope it was to you too! Next chapter!
~~~~~~~~~
Flame's Story Chapter Eleven

Terror took over my mind as I imagined Dawn choking in the midst of the deep, murky water, unable to see a thing or breathe at all, water eventually filling her lungs, drowning her slowly and agonisingly.
"We've got to so something!" I shouted frantically, desperately looking for something that I could use to rescue Dawn out of the lagoon. "There isn't anything, the boat's capsized and nearly all our supplies were on it!" Spark yelled back, making me worry even more. There seemed to be only one thing I could do to help Dawn - dive down to the bottom of the lake myself.*
The last thing I heard before the freezing water surrounded me was Aqua yelling at me to come back, and Spark warning me to be careful.*

There wasn't much time left. It was true that Espeons were one of the non-water-type Pokemon who could hold their breath the longest, but I had already spent a minute searching for Dawn, yet there was still no trace of her. My lungs weren't asking for oxygen just yet, but I was still worried that I would not find her in time.*
Thankfully the water was clearer than I thought it would be, which helped quite a lot. The lagoon was much deeper than I thought it would be; it was a never-ending, navy blue abyss, so deep that you could not determine where the bottom of the lake was. The water pressure kept becoming stronger and stronger as I travelled down deeper and deeper, and as I swam my ears hurt more and more.*

Five minutes had passed, and my lungs were finally reaching their limit. My chest seemed to begin to tighten up, and my air supply was running out. Dawn had been underwater for a much longer time than me, though. Would she be right? Would she make it? And more importantly, will I ever find Dawn?
Then, my eyes spotted a familiar pink figure - that of an Espeon. Dawn. It had to be her. My mind filling with relief, I quickly swam over to her, who was floating in the water, unable to move due to her lack of swimming skills. She, too, looked like her oxygen supply was running out slowly, her face full of panic. "Flame!" she mouthed, and tried to move forwards towards me.*
"Dawn! Are you alright?" I mouthed back, hurrying over to her. "Come on, lets get out of here! Spark and Aqua are waiting for us!"*
"Wait!" she mouthed, bubbles coming out if her mouth. "Look over there!" she pointed at something. Curiously I turned around to where Dawn was pointing and a tremendously long-looking passageway appeared in front of my eyes. It looked as if it would never end. Just an indigo, winding tunnel leading into nothing. The thing was, the passageway had obviously been carved out by a machine - nature couldn't make such a smooth, straight tunnel like that. It just had to be created by something like a drill.*
"Peculiar," I mouthed to Dawn, the last of my oxygen supply coming out with my lungs. Neither of us could take it anymore; Dawn hurriedly gestured to her paw, which I grabbed and frantically paddled back to the surface with Dawn holding on to me, where a very worried Spark and an annoyed Aqua were waiting for us.*
"We were worried about you!" Spark yelled as Dawn and I emerged from the lake, coughing and spluttering and gasping for air. "You were gone for a whole ten minutes! Not even I can stay down there that long!"
"Sorry," I muttered, shaking my fur trying to dry it. "At least I found Dawn."
"Yeah, and we wasted our time staring at some stupid underwater tunnel," Dawn scoffed.*
"It's not stupid, maybe it leads to a secret base or something," I replied. "We might as well check it out."
"What tunnel?" Aqua asked curiously.*
We told Aqua and Spark about the seemingly artificial we found underwater when I was looking for Dawn.*
"Artificial?" Spark asked. "We should go through it, no one would make an artificial underwater passageway for no reason." Aqua nodded in agreement. "Let's go! She chirped eagerly.*
"Can't we have a little rest first?" I complained. "I just returned from a rescue mission, you know."
"As if!" Dawn yelled, whacking me on the head. "I never needed you!"
"Oh yeah? Says the sad little Espeon who can't swim!" I shot back at her playfully.*
"Why you little..." Dawn shouted, and we wasted five minutes of our leisure time squabbling like kids while Aqua and Spark just sweat-dropped.*
~~~~~~~~~~
Oh come on, there's got to be some mistakes in there guys!

ZenoDBlacky
06-29-2011, 08:30 AM
Hey i wonder if you can make your chapters longer? Its more awesome if its longer

Flame Mistress
06-29-2011, 09:40 PM
It's not very easy writing long thinfs on my iPhone. I'll try to make them as long as possible.

[MuSiCa]
06-29-2011, 09:48 PM
It's not very easy writing long thinfs on my iPhone. I'll try to make them as long as possible.

...Written on "Notes" as indicated by the occasional * At the end of a sentence. No laptop though? :/

...I don't read D:
Except some books. But rarely.

Sin
07-01-2011, 05:35 PM
good stuff

Okilla96
07-02-2011, 03:51 AM
Im addicted to this lol