"Sniper Rifles were made for quickscopes."
- 7th grade, two guys discussing CoD.
"What’s Columbus' first name?"
Yeah some guy actually asked this in APUSH.
"Thai people are from Taiwan." -random freshman on my bus
KILL. ME. NOW. AND CRITICS SAY THAT MY SCHOOL IS ONE OF THE BEST IN THE NATION //headdesk
I was playing Basketball one time, well, if you could call it that. To give some info, you have to give something that you know you won't forget to the principal to rent a basketball, so you won't forget to return it afterwards.
Anyway, I had gotten the basketball, and my friends were doing NOTHING with it. They were just standing around holding it, trying to make a shot maybe once every two minutes. Since it was extremely hot outside, I said I was going to return the ball. This was the conversation.
Me: "Hey guys, I'm gonna return the ball since we're doing nothing with it, OK?"
Friend #1: "WHY?!"
Me: "....Cause it's 115 degrees outside, and you guys are barely even shooting it."
Friend: *looks me deadpan in the eye* "Do you not know how to have fun, Starry, is that it?"
...Yes, I do know how to have fun, and it sure as hell doesn't include standing outside in some of the hottest weather all year, with a ball that's basically useless.
It's not as stupid as some of the things here in this thread, but it is pretty stupid when you realize that this conversation takes place in a 400 level Digital Control Systems class that's based in Calculus.
"Professor, why does that polynomial divide into binomials?"
Again, this is in a 400 level Calculus-based Digital Control Systems class. The answer to this question is something that most people learn in Algebra 1 (That is to say, the Fundamental Theorem of Algebra). How did this guy go so far into his engineering education without knowing that nth order polynomials can be divided into n binomial roots?
And more specifically, the polynomial in question was a standard quadratic equation. ax^2 + bx + c. You know it will divide up into two binomial roots through the quadratic formula! (The worst part is, this guy is my lab partner)
Also, in the dining hall, I hear this:
"WHO CUTS ORANGES WITH A KNIFE?"
You mean to say there are people who don't use a sharp tool designed to specifically cut things in order to cut fruit?
"The Marines isn't a branch of the military, it is a subdivision of the Navy."
This was said in JROTC. By a felow LET III. III's typically know millitary basics, including the fact that the five branches of the United States Military are the Army, Navy, Marines, Air Force, and the Coast Guard.
Again, I putting numbers on this since our class goes by numbers.
Math class.
teacher passes out slips of paper "Your paper says something on it. It's one in a pair. Now go find the other person with a match."
Me: My paper says "queen" on it...gotta find the king...
#7 AKA Chelsea: Daniel...you're my queen. holds up slip of paper that says king on it *everyone explodes into laughter, including teacher*
*It takes me a second to get it* Do you REALLY THINK you could have at least game ME King and CHELSEA queen?
#14 aka De'Quan: Now Daniel has a lover in the worst way possible! I know what's next...
Me: If that's what you're implying, then shut it.
Ross the Boss, AKA THE DANGER RANGER
So this happened a few weeks ago on the 1st day of school.
Teacher: No cell phones in class unless I tell you to take them out.
Stupid idiot in my class:Hold on I need to take a selfie in 1st period. *takes picture.*
Recently I saw her take a random selfie in the middle of that hall and she says, "I'm a photographer!"
Please send help.